How to Get Your Child to School

Source: UNSPLASH

Children with school refusal have a very difficult time getting to school and/or staying in school, usually due to some type of anxiety. School refusal can mean that children have trouble going to school – or that they don’t go to school at all. Children who refuse to go to school usually spend the day at home with their parents’ knowledge, even though their parents try really hard to get them to go.

If your child refuses to go to school, you might feel that school mornings are a ‘battle of wills’. Your child might:
>> have crying episodes or tantrums
>> hide under the bed covers
>> refuse to move
>> beg or plead not to go
>> complain of aches, pains and illness before school, which generally get better if you let your child stay at home
>> show high levels of anxiety
>> make threats to self-harm.

Here are some things you can do:

1. Check for physical causes. If your child is complaining of physical symptoms, have her checked by a physician.

2. Talk with your child.  Talk about what's bothering her, while at the same time making it clear that a plan will be made to return to school. Keep in mind, though, that some children can't describe what is bothering them. Don't force conversation if it doesn't seem to be going anywhere. The most important message to convey is this: you believe your child can conquer this problem, and you'll be there to help her through it.

3. Don’t lecture. Avoid lengthy discussions and debates about the importance of going to school. Lecturing won't do any good, and it may actually make matters worse. Any attention, even negative attention, can reinforce and maintain a problem.

4 Keep an open mind. Don't assume the teacher or the school has done something wrong. Similarly, teachers should not assume the problem lies with the parents. When stress levels are high, it's natural to want to point the finger and blame someone, but it doesn't do much to solve the problem. It's important to make sure that any reality-based fears, such as bullying, are addressed and corrected.

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Quick Tips on Setting Your Life Goals

If you want to succeed, you need to set goals. Without goals you lack focus and direction. Goal setting not only allows you to take control of your life's direction; it also provides you a benchmark for determining whether you are actually succeeding.

Set goals that would keep you motivated. Ask yourself why your goals are valuable and important to you. You can use this motivating value statement to help you if you start to doubt yourself or lose confidence in your ability to actually make the goal happen.

Set relevant goals. Goals should be relevant to the direction you want your life and career to take. By keeping goals aligned with this, you'll develop the focus you need to get ahead and do what you want. Set widely scattered and inconsistent goals, and you'll fritter your time – and your life – away.

Set time-bound goals. Your goals must have a deadline. Again, this means that you know when you can celebrate success. When you are working on a deadline, your sense of urgency increases and achievement will come that much quicker.
  
Frame your goal statement positively. If you want to improve your relationship with your kids say, "I will hold on to our good memories and create more memories by having more trips or play time with them".

Make an action plan. Don't forget to plan all of the steps that are needed along the way. By writing out the individual steps, and then crossing each one off as you complete it, you'll realize that you are making progress towards your ultimate goal. This is especially important if your goal is big and demanding, or long-term.

Source: UNSPLASH

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